Tired of swipe fatigue? Why retro directories like AdultFriendFinder are winning back burnt-out daters.

Where is swipe fatigue taking us? We take a look at the future of online dating, and why it's likely to borrow heavily from retro directories like AdultFriendFinder.
 By  Jack Dawes  on 
 Woman lays on bed looking at her phone - stock photo
Credit: Trevor Williams / Getty Images

It's now official: "Swipe fatigue" has made the transition from casual online buzzword to an actual IRL experience. It's now a statistically observable phenomenon, and it's affecting how people approach dating, not to mention their ability to find matches on popular apps.

Indeed, 78 percent of Gen Z dating app users report experiencing some level of "burnout" from dating apps. That research comes from a Forbes survey, while Match Group, Inc., the conglomerate that owns Tinder and Hinge, has seen its stock value plummet by two-thirds since its peak during the pandemic. 

This fatigue has seen an increase in "IRL singles events," forcing the likes of Tinder and Hinge to take note and switch up their game plan. For instance, Tinder launched an Events feature earlier this year to highlight IRL meetups, as well as a new Festival Mode to help strangers with mutual interests meet. Meanwhile, Hinge has reportedly pumped over a million dollars into promoting offline meetups. Things are changing, and it could be for the better — certainly better for your chances of meeting someone and hooking up.

The best hookup apps, reviewed by our experts

AdultFriendFinder — readers’ pick for casual connections

Tinder — top pick for fast hookups

Hinge — popular choice for regular meetups

Pure — best for anonymous hookups

OkCupid — best app for inclusivity

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Alternatively, you could look at retro dating directories that refused to jump on the swipe bandwagon and have stuck their guns with offering something different. The issue with swipe-based dating is that it's so binary — yes or no, like or don't like — but sites such as AdultFriendFinder have instead built online communities of people looking for fun (and the spicier the fun, the better). It's about giving users multiple avenues to interact or come together (quite literally in some cases) over shared interests. 

Here's why AdultFriendFinder is the perfect example of this approach:

Matchmaking beyond the swipe

As fun as mindlessly swiping through singles profiles can be, it should dawn on you at some point that your fellow eligible locals are putting exactly the same amount of effort into evaluating your profile as you are into evaluating theirs. And that's genuinely terrifying.

If you're looking to meet someone, you need more to go off than just photos and a 200-word biography. In the past, people met at work, in college, or at their place of worship, but in the decentralized, delocalized world of the internet, that kind of constant proximity to others is becoming a rare commodity. 

Sites poised to succeed in a post-swipe-fatigue landscape are aware of this fact and are actively trying to solve the problem.  

Yes, AdultFriendFinder has its own version of the singles search, where you put in your location and filters, and it generates a list of eligible people, but that's only a small fraction of what the site offers.

Digital communities are the future

The best way to cure swipe fatigue is to remove the mechanism entirely. Instead, allow people to meet organically through interest-based online communities.

AdultFriendFinder has an entire Community section built around blogs, group chats, and shared stories, where the purpose is more than just matching with someone you might have something in common with. You can read other people's stories, share your own (with or without pictures), or participate in group discussions. There's even a handy Trending filter, so you always know what stories and discussions are generating the most buzz.

And, if you have a way with words, it's surprisingly easy to build your own following, especially when you consider how many niche or esoteric interests AFF caters to. 

Centering live chats and webcam broadcasts

For all their self-promoting talk about being the future, dating apps are shockingly low-tech. After all, we've been able to send and receive texts for over two decades now, and the swipe mechanism itself dates to before the original iPhone. What, exactly, is so special about their design? And why have they been so reticent to adopt video messaging?

Look at two of the most popular and most downloaded apps of the last decade, Snapchat and TikTok, and it's easy to see that the age of the photo is on its way out, while text messaging is as archaic as the dinosaurs at this point.

Plus, let's be real here: people already use both Snapchat and TikTok as lowkey dating sites, flirting via video chat.

This is another place where AdultFriendFinder, despite its age, is obviously ahead of its time. It made live broadcasting and video chatting a major component of its site more than a decade ago. Click on the Live Action tab at the top of their banner, and you can gain access to their Member Webcams section, where singles regularly interact with their audiences (and not just in naked, NSFW ways!). 

If you're tired of always being the one chasing and want to experience people coming to you for a change, start your own broadcast and engage with the people who watch your stream — you may be surprised by who shows up!

The future of dating apps

To be clear, we're not arguing that AdultFriendFinder is about to replace Tinder or Hinge as the go-to dating app for young daters. But we are telling you that, by every evaluative metric we have, online daters are sick of swiping and looking for something more substantive. 

We fully expect the next big dating app to offer community-based interactions rather than one-on-one swiping, and to natively support video chatting or messaging, stealing a page from TikTok's playbook.

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