AdultFriendFinder: 15 hookup app slang terms to know

A dictionary of dating and hookup slang that will help you navigate your AFF experience.
 By  Jack Dawes  on 
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Internet speak is a very real thing. Online communities develop their own vocabularies, particularly on sites and platforms that have been up and running for years — it's all part of the fun of belonging to the online world. Knowing specific terms is like a membership badge.

One place you'll find internet slang is AdultFriendFinder, one of the OG hookup sites. If you're new to AFF, it can be a bit confusing at first. You'll quickly come across lingo, acronyms, and shorthand terms that you've never heard before.

Some of the terms will be obvious or familiar from other online dating cultures, but some are particular to specialist communities, such as the worlds of BDSM and kink. 


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The best hookup apps, reviewed by our experts

AdultFriendFinder — readers’ pick for casual connections

Tinder — top pick for fast hookups

Hinge — popular choice for regular meetups

Pure — best for anonymous hookups

OkCupid — best app for inclusivity

To get you started on AFF, we've put together a glossary of essential AFF terms that will help you navigate the site:

Common AFF slang terms you need to know

  • Aftercare: Term for cuddling and/or words of affirmation after a BDSM scenario

  • Bate buds: Two or more people who enjoy masturbating to the same kinds of content and swap recommendations 

  • CD: Cross-dressing, usually referring to a person who enjoys wearing the clothing of another gender

  • Cuckolding: The practice of consensual infidelity, i.e. taking pleasure from your partner having sex with someone else, widely enjoyed in non-monogamous relationships

  • DD/LG: Acronym for "daddy dom, little girl," describing a male-dominant, female-submissive relationship

  • Dom/Domme: Short-hand term for the dominant partner in a BDSM relationship. The terms master/mistress are often used interchangeably with dom/domme

  • Edging: The practice of bringing oneself close to sexual orgasm but without ever reaching it

  • ENM: Ethical non-monogamy, which is otherwise known as an open relationship

  • Little: Short-hand term for the submissive partner in a BDSM relationship

  • Limits/Hard Limits: Someone's boundaries. Respecting limits is a central tenet of kink culture and should be practiced even in online encounters

  • MD/LB: Acronym for "mommy domme, little boy," describing a female-dominant, male-submissive relationship

  • Orgasm Control: A scenario in which one partner voluntarily relinquishes control of their sexual climax to another play partner

  • Shibari: The Japanese art of decorative rope bondage, usually requiring a high degree of experience to execute properly

  • Switch: Someone who occasionally enjoys being either dominant or submissive

  • Vanilla: A non-pejorative term describing a preference for non-kinky sexual practices

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